A Place To Call Home
by Lyralamora
Summary: She made a choice, and now she's stuck with the consequences. Pining away at her window, reminiscing of that journey years ago, Garnet tries to convince herself she made the right decision.
1. Prolouge

**A/N: **This is my first Final Fantasy IX fanfiction!  
I started this fic well before I joined , so if there's any similarities to other fics, that's purely coincidental.

The story takes place a few years after Zidanes return. Divided from her lover by duties and life in general, Dagger struggles to make sense of her existence.

I hope you enjoy, and please comment/review!

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Final Fantasy IX, but the words are all mine!

**A place to call home**

Prologue

Garnet had taken the habit of sitting in her chair by the window. She sat there, day after day, eyes scanning the horizon. She was searching for a sign of a rider, or an airship. Every time she saw something, someone, her heart made a leap in her chest. Maybe this time …

She pretended to be sleeping when someone, be it Beatrix or some servant or other, came in to disturb her from her never-ending watch. To sate her solitude, she had taken to singing, rather than seeking the company of others, reminiscing all the while.

***

_The sister moons sh__one brightly, with only a thin veil of clouds covering them. Their reflection in the lake was still and perfect. There where no complaining about lack of light tonight, when one had four moons to light the path. _

_Zidane watched her as she leaned against the window-sill, observing the little figure scurrying away in the night. The room was dark, save the light that shone through the window, illuminating her beautiful face. At the moment a frown marred the perfect picture. She turned, looking at him in worry._

"_Zidane, Vivi just walked out." _

_She fidgeted with her sleeves in distress, looking more troubled than he found reasonable. Still, there was something adorable about her oversensitivity. _

"_Maybe he's letting us have a little romantic quiet time," he had teased, knowing full well how angry it would make her. _

"_I'm serious!"_

"…_I wouldn't worry too much."_

_He sighed, turning his back to her, feigning complete calm. He had no wish to start a quarrel with her. Not now. Not over Vivi. _

"_But …"_

"_He's trying to figure something out for himself. Think about it … Vivi has never meet black mages like himself before."_

"_But what if their being mean to him, or saying nasty things?"_

"_Do you really think the people of this village gathered to do something like that?"_

_Annoyance a__t her extreme over protectiveness made him a little impatient. She could be so naïve, but when she truly cared for someone, there was no end to her suspicion and distress. He was even a little jealous at Vivi, for receiving such tenderness without even knowing it. _

"_Maybe …" he sighed. "Just maybe he'll find what he's looking for."_

"… _find what?"_

"_A place to call home."_

"_... H__ome?"_

"_Yeah… A place where he belong ..."_

***

When Zidane had returned to her that glorious day, as if waking from the dead, she had been certain she would never shed another tear. His brilliant smile and kind eyes where just as she remembered them. She had thrown herself into his embrace, savouring the feel of his arms around her, thinking she would never be alone again.

Garnet sighed, resting her head on the back of her chair. He had left again, without so much as a word. That was as it used to be. He came at infrequent intervals. Every time was as the first. He held her close, whispering soothing words of comfort. And then, like the first time, he would be gone, all too soon.

Every time he left, he asked her the same question.

"Wanna come with? You have no idea of what you're missing!"

He spoke as if it was a joke, but she new he meant it. The frustration and anger in his eyes every time declined made that obvious. He was angry that she had chosen Alexandria over him. If he only knew what it cost her. She paid her prize every day, pining away in that chair by the window.

There was no such ting as a happy ending, Garnet reflected. Or, at the very least, there would always come something after it. A final ending could only mean death, and where was the happiness in that? Still, we've all been assigned our lot in life. Some can be avoided, or simply ignored. But then there are those that is so much a part of ones life, that they defines one very character. There is another word for those kinds of duties. It's called fate.

This was hers, she held firm to that.


	2. Chapter 1

**A/N: **I hope I've done a more thorough proof-reading this time. So hope it's improved just a little.

Hope you enjoy the first proper chapter, as Zidane and Garnet grows ever further apart.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Final Fantasy IX

Chapter one

"Your hair is longer," he muttered, the warm breath tickling her neck. He caught a strand of it tugging it gently. "Remember when you cut it? With my dagger …"

They lay tightly wound together on her bed. The sheets, as well as their clothes, where scattered all over the floor.

"And Steiner's face when he saw it."

They laughed companionably. Were he lay, draped over her, she could feel the vibration of his throat against her chest. His blond hair, also grown a little longer with the years, clouded her vision.

"How's old Rusty doing?"

The nickname, always a nuisance before, when it was certain to bring about some quarrel, brought a new smile to her face. It was part of the collection of memories that she looked at, polished and treasured the most.

"Steiner is fine as far as I know. He doesn't work here anymore …"

This seemed to bring about some interest.

"What! Why?"

"He and Beatrix married. He's staying at home, looking after their children. They have to sons, you see. But the General still works here …" she trailed of.

"Well good for him … Seems everyone's settling down. Blank found himself a girl at last. He's lives in Lindblum. Runs a little place in the business district and all."

The thought of that kind of life, a shop in Lindblum, brought tears to her eyes. Why did she have to be so damnably sentimental?

"How's the Tantalus getting on without Blank?" she asked when she once more had gained control over her voice.

"Don't know. I left. Again … Didn't I tell you?"

"No … No, you did not."

***

The sun-rays on his skin made it seem even darker than usual. She was so pale next to him, something her dark hair did only enhance. He dressed in a hurry, searching frantically for his clothes, that where stern all over the room. All too soon, he was fully dressed. He sat down on the bed pulling his tattered, old boots on. Their strong odour reached even her, as she sat perched on the other end of the huge bed.

"Sorry I have to go so early. I would stay, but you know," he nodded towards the door, indicating the guards outside.

"I know," she muttered. "Come back soon, will you?"

"Or you could come with?" he said, crawling over the bed to kiss her goodbye. He lingered a little with his forehead pressed against hers.

"You know I can't," she whispered.

He pulled back, rising from the bed. "I know."

"But you will come back soon?" she persisted.

"I'll try."

And then he was gone.

Without him next to her, she soon began to shiver, and fetched the sheets from the floor. Rolling over on his side of the bed, she could smell his scent, still lingering on the pillows.

The sun made its way lazily up over the horizon. The light trickled up the walls, casting patterns from the transparent curtains over her skin. She lay perfectly still, watching as the sun-rays graced her arms and chest.

It was not as though she'd never entertained the thought of going with him. She could remember no happier time than when they where on their travels. But still, no matter what vantage-point she saw it from, she was the queen. And she would remain bound to her duties and her city for as long as she lived. Zidane was a free spirit. He'd been free to roam the world at will. The idea of duty and loyalty to a city, a home, was completely strange to him. She couldn't reproach him for not understanding. But she wished he would stop asking her. After all, she'd never asked him to leave his old life behind and settle down in the palace. That would be to ask him to not be himself. He would not seize his travels, just like she would always remain queen.

Still, she could not hold back a few, desperate tears. They made their way down the side of her face. Allowing them to flow freely for a moment, she then wiped them away with forceful determination, and rose to the duties of another day.

***

Three sharp raps on the door. Beatrix' knock.

The queen jerked upright, after having slumped down in her chair, sleeping. She had not been able to fall back to sleep after he had left her, and was now utterly exhausted. But the short nap had only deprived her of the little energy she had. Garnet was haunted by the usual dream; a tiny boat on the vast ocean. Two people struggling to keep afloat, praying to Leviathan for mercy. The nightmare had only increased in both frequency and vividness after she learned the truth behind it, and for once, she was thankful for the intrusion.

"Enter," she called out, trying not to betray any sign of exhaustion in her voice, and failing utterly.

Beatrix, having no patience with the servants and maids, pushed the door open herself, and stepped inside.

"I'm here to remind you of your engagement with Lady Eiko. You where to take tea with her in the gardens. She has been waiting half an hour."

Garnet, having completely forgotten about the appointment with her beloved friend, jumped to her feet in a flutter.

"Oh gods. I forgot. I can't believe it!" The irregular tea-visits from Eiko was one of the few things she actually used to remember Even looked forward to. It was pleasant to see a friendly face, and she always bore news of Cid, the Tantalus and, on rare occasions, even Zidane. But his surprise-visit the previous day had driven everything else from her mind.

"Why didn't you remind me, Lyssa?" she snapped at the maid quivering behind the general, irritated with both herself for forgetting, and her maids for not reminding her. "This is your job. I see no reason to keep you here, if you can't fulfil it."

The maid made an apologetic gesture, and scurried out of the way as her queen passed in a flurry of white silks and chiffon. Her queen had most certainly not grown kinder and sweeter over the years.

***

"Dagger!" the young, blue haired woman squealed in delight as she jumped off her chair and ran towards her old friend in an enthusiastic greeting. Garnet felt her lips curve into an unexpected smile as they hugged.

"I am late, I know. Time just flew past. Please except my apologies."

"Oh, Dag! It's me you're talking to. Drop the formalities, will you."

They laughed companionably, and sat down to take their tea. The garden was enormous, and offered a great view of the lake and the city, as well as the waterfalls down to Evil Forest. The young women did, however, prefer a more secluded spot for their conversation, and where seated in between the rosebushes, close to the late queen Brahne's tomb. Garnet dismissed her maids once they had brought the tea, and soon the two own them was chatting along easily without the usual decorum.

"I really have missed you. You must come in the summer, when you're finished with school."

"Yeah! Not long to go now," Eiko sighed. Her life had taken an unpleasant turn, once Cid and Hilda had noticed her lack of education and manner. The wild, untamed girl form MadainSari had been sent to school promptly. As Garnet contemplated her, over her cup of tea, she could hardly recognize the resemblance between the beautiful, proper sixteen-year old, and the rude and lonely little girl she'd once been. Though she still had that little glint of mischief in her eyes, which no amount of education could deprive her of.

"But I was thinking I'd make a little trip to the lost continent. It's such a long time since I've been home. And I really want to see Vivi again."

Vivi had settled with the remaining Black Mages in their village. Garnet had visited him once or twice, but that was years ago.

"I'll come with. It's been too long since I've seen him. And Mikoto. She still lives there, doesn't she? Zidane told me," she sighed, a gloom creeping up on her at the thought of him.

"So you still see him, do you?" Eiko asked, a note of disapproval in her voice.

"I do ... from time to time. He doesn't come too often. And I can't very well go with him."

"No. No, you can't. Garnet," she put down her cup and took the queens hand in hers. "I must confess. I'm not only here as your friend. I was also sent on behalf of your uncle Cid, with some ... advice."

Nonplussed by the sudden turn of the conversation, Garnet sat down her cup too. Eiko was rarely expressing concern, but when she did it was all the more alarming. At the moment her brows where furrowed, and her eyes distressed.

"For god's sake, what is the matter," she asked in alarm.

"No doubt your council has already told you, but still, Cid felt it important to stress the matter further," Eiko hesitated, clearly uncomfortable with what she'd been charged to say. "It is in concern to the matter of your heir, and consequently, marriage."

Garnet puller her hand from Eiko's at once. Deep down, the knowledge of her friend's good intentions lingered, but it would not be heard over the sharp pain of betrayal. She welled up, tears blurring her vision. But she must not cry! She wouldn't loose face. Not even to Eiko, one of her oldest and dearest friends.

"Please, Dagger! Please listen. Alexandria needs an heir to the throne. You are already twenty six. What if the city is left without an heir? It would be chaos and uproar for god knows how long. You're people have been through so much. They have just recovered from the last war. Would you have Alexandria been torn apart by a civil-war, just after it has been rebuilt?"

Her voice was apologetic, yet she spoke without mercy. This was something Garnet needed to hear. Something she'd no doubt heard time and time again. But this time she would have to listen.

"You are too dramatic! I'm still young, and in perfect health. In any case, if I should die without an heir, the court has already decided who will step in as regent. I will not be bullied into a marriage!"

Garnet jumped to her feet, looking every inch the part of a mighty queen.

"And what of you?" her friend retorted, her voice livid. "What of you and Cid and Lindblum? Will you pretend that people took it well, when it was pronounced that not only would a common-born take up the role as regent, but a foreigner to boot."

She saw how much her words hurt. This was a sore subject for Eiko, she new. She felt a thrilling sensation at inflicting as much pain as her friend had caused her.

"You sit there, masquerading as a fine lady. How dare you speak to me like that, when you're nothing more than an orphan from a lost city, brought up by moggles."

Eiko mirrored Garnet's movement and rose. She was quite pale, her lips quivering with suppressed rage and tears. She had to swallow once or twice in order to get her voice back. Still it sounded strangled as she turned on her way out.

"Just remember, Garnet, that so are you. Nothing more than an orphan-girl from a ruin, a lost city. And just like me, you belong more there than you'll ever belong on a throne."


	3. Chapter 2

**A/N: **This is turning out to be quite the somber story, but I hope someone is reading and enjoying it. If so, I'm sorry it has taken so long to post this chapter.

Oh, and merry Christmas!

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Final Fantasy IX

Chapter two

"Do you remember that time, in Madain Sari? When I told you that story down at the dock?" Zidane murmured through the darkness. She could nether see, nor feel him, but was acutely aware of his presence, only inches away.

"It's such a long time ago. Can't you refreshen my memory?"

"Nah. You can read it yourself. I brought you the book. It's a first edition too," he muttered. She knew full well that it made no difference to him what the book was worth. He must have remembered her excitement at the first edition-books at Eiko's.

"Where did you find it? It must be really old."

"In Daguerro. I know, I know. You aren't supposed to take 'em. But honestly, after all I've done for those book-worms. Fixed the elevator, helped that old fella. I deserve something in return."

She shook her head, smirking at his utter nonchalance in regard to rules and propriety.

"And talking of rewards …"

She sat up, kicking the sheets away with her feet, and crawling over to him. He caught on at once, and pulled her down in a feverent kiss. His lips tasted of that wine they'd been drinking earlier. At least their lack of company kept the spark between them. When he was there, he never seemed to get enough of her.

He was more gentle this time. His kisses slowed and became deeper, his hands sliding up and down her body with a little more control than usual.

"Dagger," he muttered, as he nibbled her ear. Her hands where in his hair, tugging him gently down to her.

"Dagger," he murmured again. "Come with me. Please come with."

She didn't answer, but kissed him, more hastily, more passionately than before. Still, now she was reminded of his pending departure, and a lump, cold as ice, settled in her stomach.

"Please, Dagger, please." One last whisper.

***

The night air was cold and clear. It was not yet summer, and the grass and leaves still bore traces of frost. The world looked glazed around her in the dawning light, as she lifted her arm to wave him goodbye. Choco was gaining speed, and soon they where in the air, to be lost in the darkness.  
Not all too eager to return to her empty bed, Garnet began pacing the gardens. The rosebushes towered up on both sides, the dark red buds looking black in the darkness. Frost settled on them, making them glitter in the night. It reminded her of the Ice Cavern. Everything frozen and unchanging. As if time never touched the place. Now it was ruined, like so many other things. She supposed that proved that nothing lasted forever. Nothing.

She had reached her mothers grave. The dark structure towered up in the middle of the ocean of flowers. Shudders began to rip her spine, her fingers had difficulty holding her shawl together. Yet she decided she would pay her mother a visit. It had been so long. So many days had passed by, as she held her post by the window.  
The steps where wet and slippery. The last wreath of flowers she'd put down where still there. Long dead. No one had thought to take it away, because no one but Garnet where there to tend the grave. She picked up the dead roses, and threw them on the canal, but had no knife to cut new ones. It would have to be left empty.  
Kneeling down on the hard, cold stone, she could feel her hard resolve giving in. His absence began to ace. Both their absences.

"Oh, mother. I wish you where here. I never wanted this burden," she said in a shaky whisper. Tears leaked from her eyes, dropping slowly from her white cheeks, some gathering at the tip of her nose.

"Please mother. Please help me, like you've aided me before."

Shaking with cold and grief, she gripped the cold, unresponsive tomb. Her nails scraping the stone, muscles shaking in effort.

"I have felt so alone my entire life. Please send me someone to help me shoulder the burden."

But the stone remained still and unresponsive. Her mother was truly gone. Suddenly feeling ashamed over her outburst of emotion, she stood, wiping away the wet tear tracks. Once in control of her emotions, she turned and headed back to her room, her prison.

***

"Ouch!"

Garnet whimpered and rolled over. She had fallen down on the bed, and onto something hard, that now cut into her back. She felt around in the dark, her hand suddenly gripping around the old leather of a thick book. A book? She pulled it out and read the faded letters in the scarce moonlight.

_The adventures of Ipsen and Colin_

She recognized the title, but could not remember from where. It tugged at the edge of her memory, urging her to remember. It was as if she sensed this was something of great importance. Or at least, it had once been. Now she had forgotten. _Ipsen_ … Ipsen. Could it be the builder of Ipsen's Castle? She let the book fall open in her lap, and turned the first page.

_Ipsen and his good friend Colin worked at a tavern in Treno. One day, Ipsen got a letter. The letter was so wet from rain that most of the writing was illegible. The only part he could read said "come back home". _

As she read, the scene stood before her as clear as if she was really there. Sitting in that little boat on the dock, the sun setting over the horizon.

_  
He didn't know why he had to go back, but he got some time off, gathered his things, and set out on his journey home. He walked a thousand leagues through the Mist. Sometimes he was attacked by vicious monsters, but he made it, because his friend Colin was by his side. _

She had finally summoned up the courage to ask him what she had pondered for weeks. And he had told her the story. In telling it, sitting there opposite of her, enjoying her full attention, he seemed so earnest. She truly believed there where nowhere else he desired to be than by her side.

_And then, after much time on the road … He had to ask Colin something. _

"_Why did you come with me?"_

And then the song filled the cave as they drifted out on soft waves. And the wind gently tugged her hair as she looked deep into his beautiful blue eyes, devoid of the usual quirkiness. The Eidolon Wall had looked as though on fire, giving life to it's paintings. In that brief moment, before the picture turned and she fainted, it had appeared not as a ruin, but as a city. As the most peaceful, beautiful place in the world. As home.

He would have followed her anywhere. He did. Garnet sat in the dark, her candle all burned out. She had no more tears. There where all spent by her mother's tomb. So she just sat there, the heavy book in her lap, with the same words ringing in her head. They grew louder, until nothing could be heard but them.

"_Only because I wanted to go with you." _


	4. Chapter 3

**A/N: **I wrote, and rewrote this chapter so many times. Now it's done, and I hope you like it! Thank you so much to those who have reviewed. It means a lot.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Final Fantasy IX, and am merely borrowing its characters to play with for a while.

Chapter three

Garnet found that if she let her gaze wander towards the open windows and the scorching sun outside, that she was able to stay awake. Perhaps not attentive, but at least she was not snoring, offending her guest and old friend. But every once in a while she drifted of, and had to ask her old tutor to repeat the last sentence.

She had not slept for days, kept awake by the memory that had recently resurfaced. It rattled around in her mind in the night hours, depriving her of rest. During the day she often dozed of in her chair, only to be awoken by the old nightmare of the boat in the storm.

Her hand was shaking slightly despite her best efforts, as she put the cup to her mouth. The diamond earring scratched against her neck at every tiny movement. It made her sit as still as possible. It was the one she had been given by Eiko, all those years ago. She did not need the reminder. For though she was slightly ashamed by her own conduct, it was not enough to cancel out the raging feeling of betrayal. The insults and accusations. So she sat perfectly still, perched in her chair.

Her guest most have sensed something amiss, for he cocked his head, looking at her with concern.

"It has been too long, Dr. Tot," she greeted, and smiled at her old tutor.

"Indeed it has, my child. I have been so occupied, and I daresay so have you."

He returned her smile over the brim of his own cup. But Garnet new him well enough to detect worry in his eyes. Eager to avoid any personal questions, she averted her gaze. Her hand was in her hair, fiddling absentmindedly with the piece of diamond.

"And how have you been? I understand you have been teaching Eiko."

At this he lit up.

"Yes. Remarkable young girl. Or woman, I should say. She just passed her exam with flying colours."

She nodded slightly, the thought of Eiko making her restless.

"You look a great deal paler." he muttered.

"Yes... One of the consequences of being trapped in a palace."

"Trapped?"

She shook her head, cursing her own choice of words.

"My apologies. That was not what I meant."

He did not answer, but kept looking at her in the same, concerned manner.

"Eiko has travelled to The Black Mage Village. As I understood, you did not want to go with her."

Blood rose hotly to her cheeks. She felt a stab of annoyance, both at Eiko, for daring to speak of her, but also at her self, for being so obvious. For blushing at the mere mention of the incident.

"No. My duty lies here ... As you well know."

"My dear, I'm sure the country could spare you for a few weeks. Life is infinitely more than duties, you know."

Garnet put her cup gently down on the table. The porcelain was clattering softly against the hard wood. Her mind drifted back to the meeting earlier that day.

"Not for a queen, I'm afraid."

She gave him a week smile that did not reach her eyes.

"Can I ask you something ... in regards to your powers."

She could sense him beginning to tread more lightly.

"Naturally."

"Do you still posses your summoning-powers?"

"Yes."

Whatever she expected, it was not this. She stared at him, a little taken aback, and also slightly insulted.

"I haven't used them for some time. But their still there."

"How do you know?"

At this she no longer bother to conceal her annoyance.

"Because I feel them. Why do you ask, Doctor?"

"I think that in all you talk of duties, you underestimate the power of choice. You obtained your powers because you made the choice to. You have now made a choice not to use them. It is likely that the eidolons soon will choose new masters. Someone that will put them to use."

Dr. Tot's voice rose to meet hers. The reproach was clear, and he met her raging gaze with determination.

"Who? There are no others. Eiko and I are the only ones left from Madain Sari."

Adjusting his spectacles, he held his cup out for more tea. Taking his good time, Garnet began to fidget impatiently.

"That is what we first believed. But we have discovered others. You where not the only summoner to escape."

"We? Who are we?"

"The Tantalus has aided me in seeking them out. We are endeavouring to rebuild the summoner-village. It's too great a heritage to loose."

"I see."

Her hand was once again in her hair, tugging at the earring.

"And Zidane? Did he know anything about this?"

Dr. Tot gave her a sympathetic look. She did not notice, but stared fixedly out on the towering buildings that could be spotted in the distance. Without knowing why, she dreaded his answer. Did Zidane not feel she had the right to know, because of her choice. Because she decided to be a queen first and a summoner second?

"No. He left Tantalus some time ago."

"Yes, he told me."

Strangely relieved at this, she breathed a deep sigh and slumped back in her chair. Tired with the strain of emotion, she absentmindedly let her gaze follow the embodiments of the tablecloth. It was old Alexandrian needle work, in brilliant colours that had now begun to fade. As she once more sipped her tea, she recalled something Tot had said about how she regained her summoning-powers. He said it was because she chose to... but had there not been a test. She remembered that day at Pinnacle Rocks. It must have been ten years ago. She had been so frightened, so weak, yet determined to protect her people. And in her desperation she had wished for the only power she new strong enough to do just that.

***

_"Let me ask you one thing ... How come you chose human for your conclusion?"_

_The mighty eidolon bobbed before her in the air in slow and docile movements. She quickly searched her brain for whatever she had read about these sorts of stories, and concocted a sensible answer._

_"People pass down stories of other people to whom they feel an affinity. The people in the story had flaws, as we all do. That is why they became heroes in the people's mind."_

_There, that sounded impressive enough. She fidgeted a little with the end of her sleeve, slightly ragged after the long journey, while waiting his judgement in suspense. He deliberated a few moments, whilst staring at her with grave eyes. Even though he was pure mist, the wind tugged a little at the edge of his cloak and long beard. _

_"... I want to know what you think, in your own words."_

_This she had not expected. Hesitant and blushing she thought of her country, her people, her mother._

_"Me ...? I am away from my country, but I haven't forgotten about my people ... "_

_He sighed, and gave her a friendly nod._

_"... Your soul is very tense right now. Maybe you'll begin to relax once I become your eidolon ..."_

_"Thank you!"_

_"There are many paths. Remember that you alone choose the path on which you walk."_

_She was too relieved to catch his last words. She could remember the words "Maybe now ..." ringing in her head. Maybe now she would not be so weak. Maybe now she would be able to save her friends. Those that had been pulled out on this mission involuntarily. Zidane, Vivi, Steiner. All of them..._

_***_

"Garnet .... Garnet."

Tot's voice rose in concern. She shook her head and looked up, back in the present.

"I... I got my powers because I passed a test."

Tot, looking slightly confused, shook his head.

"No no, my dearest. What sort of test would that be? No, only you can decide if you want to live out the potential in yourself. Only you can choose how to lead your life."

Utterly confused and tired, she could feel hot tears well up in her dark eyes.

"But that is not true. Ramuth said I had to pass a test."

She knew she sounded like a child, weeping at the slightest reproach. Her weakness only made her that much more angry. She had not chanced too much from that weak and helpless girl at Pinnacle Rocks.

"That might only be to understand your character properly. For when Ramuth appeared, was it not at the same moment that you wished him to?"

It was true, but still, why would the eidolon lie?

"You might be right about that, but anyway," she said, trying to chance the subject. "It's not all true. I have only duties. No choices..."

Doctor Tot deliberated her for a long while, before he rose. Picking up his hat, he turned to her.

"At times life's duties may seem overpowering. But remember; everything is a choice. Why are you so set on the fact that this is your destiny."

She was not entirely certain she believed in fate, but at that moment it certainly seemed like the world was governed by their gods. As Doctor Tot put his hat back on, and turned to leave, the doors burst open. The queen rose in anger, outraged that someone dared disrupt a private visit, and in such a brutal fashion. But the sight that meet her, made her hold her tongue.

Zidane, stranding in the door frame, looked dirty, fatigued, but most importantly, scared to death. His eyes where wild with panic, his body almost shaking.

"Dagger," he whispered, as he stumbled into the room. "Dagger... you've got to help him."

Pushing the good doctor aside, she ran across the room to meet him. Taking his arm, stroking it in a vain attempt to calm him.

"Help who?"

***

He had grabber her by the wrist in a hard grip that was sure to bruise her sensitive skin, and was now dragging her unceremoniously down the corridor that lead to her private chamber. Tot was left a little dumbfounded by the table, watching them as they went. Zidane pulled the door open, shoving her inside, before slamming it shut.

Before he had the chance to speak, she threw herself at him, hugging him thigh. Through half-closed lids she could glimpse her chair by the window. That cursed thing that kept her trapped day after day. But now he was here. No matter how bad news he bore, she was free for the moment. That was worth any price.

"Who needs my help? Is it something with the law? You know I can only take so many liberties."

"No ... nothing like that."

He held her briefly, but pushed her away all too soon.

"It's Vivi-"

But then his voice broke, and he could not go on. Horrified she watched as his eyes filled with tears, face contorted in pain. Her hurt at being pushed away so quickly was gone at once.

"Zidane ... what happened?"

"Dagger, he's dying... He's dying... you have to try and save him."

Shocked beyond belief, numb with surprise of his news, another thought struck her. That of her duty. He would surely ask her to go with him, this time certain that she could not refuse. He would ask her, any second now. But she would have to turn him down yet again, and watch his cold hurt, as another light flickered and died in his eyes. And they would drift yet another inch apart. They had already drifted for years. And now those small inches had become such a very great distance. A distance she would now have to enhance. And Vivi ... he would surely die as a consequence. The dread spread through her, flowing and seeping into every muscle, taking full control.

"Dagger!"

He shook her, her head bobbing back and forth like a rag-dolls.

"Dagger!"

Her eyelids fluttered. Regaining control she lifted her head, looking him straight in the eyes.

"I cannot come with you."

Zidane's hands, warm on her shoulders, froze. Slowly he let her go, holding her steadfast gaze all the while.


	5. Chapter 4

**A/N: **Sorry for the long wait, but here is chapter four at last. I have, as of yet, been unsuccessful in finding a beta. Though I have read through the text many times, there are surely still misspellings, and other mistakes. I apologize and continue my frantic search.

But anyways, this chapter is somewhat of a turning point. Hope you enjoy it!

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Final Fantasy IX

Chapter four

Had this been years ago or maybe just one, he would not have believed her. He would flash his brilliant grin, despite the grave situation, not taking heed of her answer. But today, after ten years of refutations, he finally understood; she would not come with.

"You're serious, aren't you?"

He needn't ask, but did so anyway. His grey-sky eyes wide with reproach and sorrow. She could not make herself meet them, and quickly averted her gaze.

"Dagger, this isn't me asking you to come with. This is... my god, it's Vivi!"

"I understand full well why you ask. But I-"

"But you can't go. Yeah you said that."

He spun around, fists clenching and unclenching. As she could not look at him for shame, he could no longer stand to look at her. Though she could not see his face, she heard his deep, desperate breaths. Driven to the edge by both distress and anger, he could barely contain his grief. It threatened to break his voice and well up in his eyes. For a long while the sound of his gasping breath was the only thing that filled the room.

"Zidane, listen!"

She found her usually controlled and forceful voice just as shaky and pathetic as his.

"Today there was a meeting with the council. It has been decided that I am to marry. The announcement will be tomorrow. If I where not to show up, I would not only abandon one of my most fundamental duties, but I would surely mortally offend my coming fiancé. You have no idea of the damage this would do to the alliance. An alliance Alexandria needs."

"But your the queen," he interjected, his back still turned. "They'll do whatever you tell them to."

It had always been difficult for Zidane to understand the politics behind the monarchy. She appreciated this, somehow thinking him untainted by the greedy and corrupt world that surrounded them. It had made him a beacon of integrity and generosity, in her eyes. But at times like these his ignorance could be too much to bear.

"That I'm the queen does not make me the sole-governor of this country. I'm more a mask of tradition, controlled by the duties that are expected of me. If I'm told to marry, I must."

She sighed, walking up to him, placing her hand on his slightly shaking shoulder.

"To you it must seem that I convict our friend to death. But you must understand that if I should damage the alliance, Alexandria could be facing civil-war. Far more people would die..."

"... I see."

He shrugged of her hand, making for the door.

"I will tell Vivi you said 'hi'."

Standing in the door frame, he turned. The tear-streaks glimmered in the gleaming sunlight. It was the first, and she supposed the last time she'd seen him cry. He had never looked more beautiful then at that moment.

"Congratulations, I suppose."

The he was gone.

***

The emptiness he left her with, hit her with the same force as always. She staggered, clutching at her sides, as if her chest was about to split open. Drawing short, painful breaths, she stumbled for the chair.  
Slumped in the cushions, she struggled to breathe. It was as if a whirlpool of distress and loneliness pulled her down, down. The sight of her city did not bring about its usual calming effect, because no matter how far, how wide, she was able to see, it seemed futile. Her reason for looking was not coming back. She knew, beyond all doubt, that he would not return. Not this time. His lack of understanding did drive forth some annoyance, but she dismissed the feeling, knowing it to be unreasonable. She could never expect him to understand. Nevertheless, pining away by the window suddenly seemed unbearable, without the prospect of seeing him again.

And the chair! The chair that had kept her trapped, standing idly by as her council had piece by piece stripped her of her power.

The chair... it's white, fluffy cushions, lace trimmed, comfortable and proper. She would break free. All pent up anger, the baggage she had gathered over the years, suddenly found the focus of it's, if not release, then outlet.

Throwing herself around where she sat, she tore, kicked and scratched. Gasping for air, she pounded loose. It was only when she realized that the red tainting the white fabric, was not her failing vision, but blood. Sizing her attack she stumbled to the floor.

Holding up one aching arm, she saw the blood that tricked down her pale arms. She studied the phenomenon in puzzlement. How long had it been since such an injury? The blood seemed to stem from her nails. They had suffered the most in her outburst. Aside from the chair, of course. It was easily treated, but she did not summon forth the spell that would heal her. It was a feeling like no other; pain. One that had not touched her in ten years. She revelled in the aching, throbbing sensation of blood gushing to her wound with every heartbeat.

As last fascination gave way to sense, and she prepared herself for the simple cure-spell. Once she tried, however, the magic did not flow with the same ease it once had. When the silvery light once erupted around her wounds, she could feel her energy drain. The blood-flow had sized, but she was suddenly tired.

How odd. Perhaps Tot had been right after all. That her magic-power should have declined for lack of use, was not all that surprising. But would it really fade all together?

***

Alexandria, for all its beautiful canals, grand towers, romantic docs and sweet little houses, Garnet could conceive a place more beautiful than the roof of Alexandria Castle. The spectacular view of seemingly endless oceans on one side, and the majestic mountains on the other. The sky, that was almost always blue in this part of the continent, made the middle tower glitter in impossible brightness. For one standing in the busy streets, or in the courtyard for that matter, it merely seemed beautiful. But standing on the roof, the light that illuminated was so incandescent that she had to avert her eyes to avoid being blinded. Even when not looking directly at it, it offered warmth, almost like a presence. She new what it was; the soul of Alexander, having taken place in the castle as one final defence.

Garnet rarely climbed to the roof, however. It was not meant for taking strolls. The only stairs that led up was the flight route. And with no balustrades or fences, carelessness could result in a two-hundred meter pummel to the hard cobble stones below. Not that she was in any way careless, but the rest of the castle seemed to believe so. So she avoided the roof and the inevitable scolding a visit was be sure to bring about.

But today, she decided, she would venture to the top. Beatrice and the others be damned.

As she made her way, step by step, she recalled what had happened there on that roof. Well, parts of it. Most had been destroyed with Alexander. They had tried to rebuild the castle, but it had proven impossible. There must have been something about the eidolons presence that held it all together.

And as Alexander had been penetrated by the bright turquoise light, he had come to her. Zidane. She recalled the sparkling rings that radiated down the feathery, protective wings, turning them to ashes, as Garland forced the eidolon to destroy itself. The middle tower had not been gleaming in sunlight, but the electric pulse of power, the radiating, multicoloured light. Crackling, as if the towers substance somehow made Alexander's forces grow, she could feel it's warm pulse, as it suddenly possessed her pendant.

As the bricks came tumbling down, Zidane had come to her. Risking life and limb, as was only his nature, he had come to her rescue. She would have expected to feel small, humiliated, by having to be saved once again. And yet, as she saw him, through her tears, she could not recall having ever felt such happiness.

He had grabbed her waist, and pulled her close, holding on to that banner as they had done the first time they met.

"_Dagger... I'm sorry..."_

_He was sitting slumped on the hard stone, shoulders sagging in shame and exhaustion. She had wanted to speak up. To hold him close and tell him it was alright. But there was something in her. A settling dread. She was not able to find her voice, so she let him speak. _

"_I don't know why I wasn't honest with you..."_

Stepping out in the sunlight, the words continued to haunt her. Everything he said, everything he did. Would she ever be able to let it go?

Despite her exhaustion and aching heart, she crossed the roof with some eagerness. It was a long time since she had last visited this place, and she looked forward to feeling the calming company of her eidolon once again. She needed only standing close to the middle tower, and a warming presence would reach out and touch her.

But as she did just that, stepping closer to the blinding light, she felt nothing. No presence. No other than the feeling of dread that crept up on her. Cold, yet contemplative. There was nothing of that desperate passion from before. Only a slow comprehension, accompanied by coldness. Almost as if she was devoid of all emotion, and frost was the only thing she could feel.

Doctor Tot was right. He had presented her with a hypothesis, and now she could no longer ignore the empirical evidences (if it could be called such a thing when in regard to magic). The pulse of life she had once felt so distinctly was now indiscernible for her. And that would make Tot's ultimatum unavoidable.

She would ether have to chose this life; Garnet til Alexandrios, queen of Alexandria. Or Dagger of Madain Sari.

It was most incongruous, for though she believed she had stayed faithful to her own character, her future had always been carved in stone. It was not something she contemplated. She was to take up rule of this country.

And yet, how many summoners where there? Even with those newly discovered, there would not be many. Did she not have a duty to her own heritage? It was almost as if her life was predestined. Her actions mattered little, because in the end her main purpose would be ether to maintain the royal line or her summoner-heritage.

It was as a choice between two lives. Still, when she understood what life would require of her, ether as a queen or as a summoner, it all became clear to her. She understood.

Zidane had chastised himself for not being hones with her, right after he had saved her life. Always open towards her. Always true to himself. She had taken pride in that as well, but had she ever really been?  
Vivi had told her what he'd said as he ran of to save her. That she was the most important thing to him. Vivi...

If only she was not too late.


	6. Chapter 5

**A/N: **The storyis nearing its end now, but there's still a little bit to go. Dagger finally embarks on a long postponed journey.

**Disclaimer:** Final Fantasy IX is the property of Squaresoft

Chapter five

The ocean was quite large. Naturally, but it had always been an abstract notion, and never before had she given much thought to its quantity. Not since that first crossing in the little boat.  
But as Garnet paused in the darkness, looking out on Alexandrias harbour and the vast ocean beyond, it suddenly dawned on her how impossible the journey was. She had no chocobo to fly her where she desired and Fossil Roo had been closed for some time. There was no way one could pilot an airship alone, and so the only option of reaching Lost Continent would be across the multitudinous seas.

When leaving the roof earlier that day she had made a plan. A plan she was now putting into action. She had walked mechanically to her rooms, never pausing or hesitating. After packing a little bag and changing to something more suitable, she had written a letter. It felt somewhat inadequate, and she wished she could have spoken to Beatrice in person. But it would have to be done like this. Firstly she did not wish to linger, and secondly she had planned it thus. And she would not stray from her plan or else she might not be brave enough to go through with it, she might not be able to break the years of routine and seize something new.

And thus her life as the queen of Alexandria had been quickly and efficiently concluded. Every relation tidied neatly away together with her dress and the jewellery. Now she was already at the harbour, contemplating her escape.

But how cross an ocean alone, she pondered while pushing up against the wall, keeping in the shade of the moonlight.  
Though she felt that she had outgrown them, and that she was simply too mature to wear orange, she had donned the old jumpsuit and cloak. It felt right, almost poetic, starting this new journey in the same manner as she had the last one. But the white fabric of her cloak did little to conceal her as she pressed up against the unyielding wall.

She would need to travel by boat, and one that was small enough so that it could be manoeuvred by one person. Alright then, she would need to steal a boat.

She stepped out of the shade, into the too bright moonlight radiating from the sister moons. How did that letter go again?

"_When the night sky wears the moon as its pendant_

_I shall await you at the doc."_

Eiko certainly had changed. Tot too. She cast of the random though and tried not to draw attention too herself as the walked down to the pier. There weren't many guards here, but if she should be caught, she would not be recognized. There would be wasted a lot of time with tedious explanations before she would be let go and by then the castle might be alerted to her escape.

She had to admit that she was surprisingly graceless compared to her old self as she tiptoed across the cobblestones. She may once have been able to manoeuvre with her Rod and bag both fast and stealthily. But that was many years ago. The wood made a protesting creak as she stepped on it. She cringed, cursing her lack of grace. But the sound of waives against stone and wood in lazy, regular motions drowned any sound she'd made and so she was soon seated in a little sailboat without having drawn attention from the guards or some unwanted sailor.

She settled in, made the preparations, loosened the ropes and then she was off. How peculiar, she thought, looking up at the castle as it slowly grew smaller. It was lit up in the night, the mid tower reflecting the stars and moons on the unconcealed sky. Her city, her home, all fading in the distance. It all seemed to dance before her eyes, flickering with her fluttering eyelashes. She should be heartbroken. She should be cringing at the deck, weeping. And the fact that she was not, did not, made her feel guilty as though she betrayed Alexandria in some way. But, she mused, she supposed she was done mourning. She had after all been for ten years.  
There are times you don't belong, and you thing you might die from loneliness or estrangement from life itself. Even though she abandoned her duties, her friends, her home, she could not bring herself to mourn it because in doing so she chose life.

Home, Garnet contemplated, as it grew ever smaller. Had he not spoken of homes? Of his own search for one. And Vivi's. He was still searching, she new.

***

She woke midday by the scorching sun. Water stretched seemingly endlessly to every side. It was as though the ocean was a living creature, nudging the boat this way or that. She had hoped the journey would take no more than two days given the right weather. But if the lack of wind persisted it would take considerably more. Thankfully she was adept at waiting.

There was something about the ocean that had always given her a certain feeling. As a child she had often been drawn down to the docs. She could sit there for hours, revelling in the salty breeze and the demanding wind that tugged her hair as if trying to rip it loose. At the time she had thought little of the attraction it held on her. Now, she realised it must have been those repressed memories of the city by the ocean that had once been her home.  
As she sat there slowly drifting she realized she found the sea strangely erotic. It sounded strange, even to her own ears, but was the truth nevertheless. When staring at the ocean, at its power and wilful force, she had always given into her fantasies, exploring her sexuality. It had all been fairly virginal and innocent at first, but a revelation for someone so young. And those early stages of her explorations had evolved to something more. It was in the little boat on the docs of Madain Sari that she and Zidane had had their first serious conversation. It was then she realized she was in love with him. More than that; that she wanted him.  
And so the ocean, with its liberating power and beauty, would forever be linked with the sensual in her mind. Not love, but eroticism. For a walk on the beach was not the same as that in the forest. It was not as being enveloped in the green and protective darkness. It was not the gentle and pleasing cent, nor the soft ground and pleasant sounds. It was not love. It was the cent of salt that tugged her nose, the cold wind and the crushing waves. Sensual and demanding. And it was what she once more thought of as she drifted on the lazy waves.

Yet even Garnet had to admit that the hours began to get tedious. Not to mention uncomfortable in the cramped space. The heat and lack of food was less bothersome because it was something new. Almost like a new sensation altogether. The novelty of something so uncomfortable was enough to make her treasure it.

It was not until dusk that the wind began picking up. A light breeze cut through the torrid air, soon growing into a real wind. As the boat pushed forward through the waves, it grew ever more powerful. Though the speed increased considerably, it made her worry that this would be a repeat of last time.

***

As night fell on, it proved it was indeed just that. The waves grew higher, the wind more powerful. Water came rushing over the sides, and it was all she could do to hold on. The sail creaked and moaned with the wind, the sky pitch black as a torrential downpour soaked her even more. As the cold crept into her fingers, making it more difficult to hold on, she found she no longer appreciated the feel of real weather and the confrontation of difficulties, but began looking for a solution.

The storm would be ideal if she had some way of manoeuvring the boat. But alone in this weather she stood no chance. Last time she had done nothing but curl up and pray to Leviathan. This time she was determined to do more. But what? She was completely at the mercy of the elements. There was nothing _to_ do. Nothing to do but pray. But Garnet did not pray to Leviathan. She commanded him. Or at least she once had.

She remembered freeing him from his cage at the trunk of the Lifa Tree. She felt his pulsing power, enough to crush the entire Alexandrian fleet. And she remembered the seething disappointment almost bordering on hatred. For he could not help her. He could not save her mother. And then what was the use? But now she needed him more than ever. Now, that he might choose not to answer her call. The irony was not lost on her.

Gathering her Rod, trying to hold it steady in her shaking hands, she repeated the spell, summoning forth the monarch of the seas.

There where years since she had been so focused. But now she wished, she truly wished, rather than taking for granted, that he should come. And he did. As she let go, opening her eyes, hoping against hope that he would be there, the surface was pierced by the gigantic serpent. At the sight of the fearsome creature that had come to her aid, she fell to the deck, exhausted yet content.

***

Wood was hard. As was the bottom of this boat where the construction did little to soften the material.  
As consciousness began to creep up on her, this was the first hazy though that ran through her mind. Thankful for something other than emptiness, her mind clung onto that thought. She mulled it back and forth; the texture, the feel. The idea gave her the knowledge of a ground under her, no matter how uncomfortable it might be. Slowly other thoughts followed and filled her empty mind. Thoughts like where she might be and how scorching the sun felt on her face.

She cracked one eye open, carful not to be blinded by the sun. The sky was a bright blue, as was only expected. But around the fringes of her vision was quite another phenomenon. Cliffs towered high above her. She recognized at once the brown- red tinged rock. The thought that she might actually have ended up where she hoped to be, seemed almost ridiculous. And yet the shade of rock was unmistakable.  
She sat up wincing as her back complained loudly. She was still soaked to the bone despite the burning sun. Her modest potion of possessions lay scattered around her in an unorganized mess.  
As she turned the first thing she saw was Bahamut. Or rather the image of Bahamut. But as the sun hit the Eidolon-Wall, he looked almost life-like next to Athmos and Shiva. Right in front of her was the docks. The little that was left of the pier protruded into the water, parting the waves.

There she was. Boat lodged into the cliffs of the one place she had hoped to end up. The place that held so many pleasant memories. The one that, despite the ruins and the too torrid air, was her home. Or at leas it had once been. Perhaps she would make it so again. Perhaps. But the time for that was not now.

She dislodged the boat. Her motions where clumsy and stiff but after a few minutes struggle she managed. Paddling the remaining way, she tied the boat, gathered her belongings and climbed up on the unsteady pier. There was no time to linger, to enjoy the cent of the waves and the freshness of the air. It was, after all, still a long journey before she would reach the Black Mage Village.

***

"Come away from the window. It's been three days."

"Look! Is he waking?"

"Be silent. He's just restless."

The whispering voices carried out in the night. There where no other sounds then their hushed voices, save from the distant twitter of an owl and the sound of water pushing idly past in the little stream.  
Standing just outside the ray of light that flickered form the open window, Garnet listened. Listened and waited. The full moons allowed her to take it all in. The small wooden houses with their straw-tops. The maze paths suspended over the unsteady ground. Through the window opposite, she could see the inhabitants of The Black Cat. It was after hours, and the two mages where packing up. One was doing retail while dancing absentmindedly to the music stemming from an old gramophone. The other was baiting the cat down from where it had once more dislodged itself on the roof. Garnet felt her lips quirk upward despite herself. The sight of such domesticity and quiet contentment despite the terrible hardship they had once been through served as evidence that such a thing was really possible. You could put the past behind you. More than that; learn from it, but not linger and wallow. They had built this village together to spend the remainder of their days in peace.

"Alright. I'm commin'. But she'll be here. Just you wait."

"Yeah, yeah. She'll come. Just get in here and close the window. I'm starving!"

She watched the dancing mage, as he pulled his friend into the rhythm. The cat meowed for attention and maneuvered between their legs. They had indeed managed just that. They had concord happiness and peace.

The window next to her closed, the voices abruptly cut of. Zidane had left the window at last. She turned away from the dancing couple and the hungry cat and knocked.


	7. Chapter 6

**A/N: **T his chapter took longer than it should have. I've just been so busy with school lately. Anyways, I've taken some freedom with names in this chapter. I wasn't sure what's Beatrice's surname is, so I named her after the leading man of Final Fantasy XII, making her Beatrice Bunansa :D

Oh, and there'll be another faint-spell by Dagger. Believe me, I find it tiresome too, but I think that this will be the last one. And after all, she's always been a bit delicate (loosing her voice, fainting ect).

So I hope you like this next, slightly dramatic part!

**Disclaimer:** Final Fantasy IX is the property of Squaresoft.

Chapter six

As the sun made its steady was up over the horizon, chasing away the fog that settled in the damp streets of Alexandria during the night, the Steiner-residence was in an uproar.

Beatrice had had quite the fit when the news of this nickname reached her ears, insisting that it should be called the Steiner/Bunansa-residence (preferably the Bunansa/Steiner-residence, or just skip Steiner altogether) but the name had never caught on.  
Nevertheless, in a household of one general and three small children, every morning was full of activity. But this morning was not like every morning. This morning Adelbert Steiner was back on the job.

There where naturally other, more pressing matters that far overshadowed a Plutoknight pulled out of retirement. But for Steiner it meant chaos.  
They had been roused in the middle of the night by a distraught messenger with news of the queens disappearance and a letter for Beatrice. She had left at once to organize a search, while he had been ordered back to duty by his unyielding wife. Now he was alone with three children that would have to get dressed and then be disparaged at the friendly neighbors', and a suit of armor that simply was too rusty to be fit to be seen.  
After ordering his children mercilessly over to the old hippo next door, he gave up cleaning the armor and donned another (that was getting a bit tight around the waist), then to make his way to the castle.

It was bad news indeed. As he reveled in the thoughts and curious emotions his return to the castle prompted, his wife came hurtling towards him across the hall. As much as the great general Beatrice ever hurtled. Nevertheless, she interrupted his train of thought by her worried frown and hasty movements.

"Steiner." She never called him Adelbert, and he'd never asked her to. It was a curious relationship; all respect, and decorum, and carefully concealed passion. "Come."

He nodded curtly and followed her out of the hall, into the queen's private rooms. She led him into the tea-room, to the chair by the window.  
On a torn, blood-spattered cushion lay an envelope. Only one word adorned the front.

'_Beatrice'_

"This is from her Majesty?"

He turned to his wife, assuming she had already read it.

"Yes. Though we don't know who construed it."

"It was not the Queen?" he asked. At this she lunged for the letter and pressed into his glowed hand.

"Read," she commanded. It was no disobeying her when she got like that. In any case, he had no wish to. He loved following orders, the military-man that he was. And so he tore the envelope open without hesitance.

Inside there was an unofficial letter for Beatrice written in Garnet's own handwriting. There was also a document that stated the queen's abdication. Horror struck, his eyes shot up to meet his wife's.

"What's this? Surely Garnet would never abandon her duties?"

"Would she?"

She grabbed the letter, her distress plainly visible now.

"She says that she has left to repay her dues. That there are more important duties than the ones keeping her here. It's all pretty evasive."

"You imply…" Steiner's eyes dropped to the blood-spatter on the chair. "Some abduction of sorts? The Queen has been kidnapped?"

"I…it would seem that's the case. She's nowhere to be found…However-"

"Yes," Steiner urged her on, contemplating her uncertainty.

"Vivi is sick. Dying, I hear. Perhaps…"

Master Vivi sick? Why had nobody told him? Why hadn't his wife brought him this news before? She could be cold sometimes, he knew that. Not heartless exactly, just simply unaware that people could have feelings where she had none.  
The news shocked him, saddened him. He knew of the little mages blatant fear of death. If there was one thing that could distract his power, it was that cloud of fear always hovering over him. If he was indeed dying, he would need his friends. But it seemed unlikely Garnet would abdicate, or indeed leave Alexandria to be with him. Even if he was a good friend. She was so changed…

He coughed, breaking his train of thought.

"Then we'll now where to begin."

"We?"

She stowed the letter away, looked at him in confusion.

"Now that the queen has abdicated, I am to take up her post."

"Not until we now for sure that that's what's going on. If you seem too eager to take the job, people might even suspect you to be behind this."

"Right," she curtly acknowledging the logic of his statement and nodded with that determination he so cherished.

"To the Black Mage Village then."

***

The bright light that emanated from inside the doorway stung her eyes as the door fell open. As she slowly adjusted to the brightness, the black contours in front of her came into sharper focus.  
There stood Blank; face tan, hair red. The same as he'd always had been, save for a change of clothes and a web of fine lines about his eyes.  
He glanced at her for a second, surprised and hesitant all at once. She stared over his shoulder into the room.

It was small and cramped with people. Vivi had plenty of friends to come see him off. The room was scarcely furnished, living-room and sleeping quarters where combined. For Garnet the notion of such a modest living space was outlandish, but it suited him in a way. He had no need for grand halls, only a small candlelit room filled with friends.

Friends that had not yet noticed her.

"It's really quite simple. Dying. I used to be so scared, remember?"

"…yes… I remember."

"Do you…do you recall the cargo ship that took us to Lindblum. All those mages…my brothers… they refused to step aside. Or Dagger's mom. When we left on her escape pod back to Mist Continent, and…we brought her body with us?"

"I remember Vivi. I remember it all."

"Tell us," another voice uttered from a corner. Garnet could glimpse the telltale signs of purple hair even through the darkness, but the voice was so soft she barely recognized it. "Tell the story Vivi. For those that weren't there."

Eiko understood its purpose, Garnet supposed. Maybe Zidane did not. Maybe he was too distraught to comprehend its meaning. They all gathered closer around, listening to the anecdote. Blank stepped quietly aside, granting her access into the room.

She was left standing at the door, not certain where to go. She did not want to interrupt the story, nor bring about the fight that was sure to come once Zidane saw her. So she did not move, but stood awkwardly a few paces away, listening intently to Vivi's story.

***

_I don't know why Bahamut attached the one who summoned him. But we found Brahne on the beach, next to her escape pod. She could hardily move, and I thought she would come to a stop any second._

_I hate Kuja a lot… But I hate Brahne a lot too…  
…So much that I wanted this to happen to her. _

_I should be happy, but… Once I saw Dagger start to cry, I didn't know how I should feel. I kind of wanted to cry, too… _

_The Queen was lying spread eagled in the sand, her belly protruding upwards into the air. I couldn't see her face, only the ragged movements of her labored breathing. Her formidable figure had made a slant in the sand, as though she was slowly sinking down. Down beneath the earth.  
Dagger, so slight in comparison, was kneeling beside her. _

"…_I…can hear…my daughter's voice."_

"_Yes mother. I'm here."_

_She looked as though she wanted to touch. To grab hold and with physical force hold her still, making sure she would not sink further. But she dared not touch for fear of injuring her. So she only leaned inn a little closer. _

"_Right here."_

"_I…I am empty now. Free… free… of that… terrible… greed." _

_With every word there was a pause as she drew a new breath. Even as she was speaking, her voice got weaker. _

"_Mother…"_

"_I haven't… felt this way… since I saw that play… with you… and your father. I led… Alexandria… down… the path… of ruin... The people… will be… happier… with you… on the throne…"_

_How right she was. And yet the crushed expression that marred Daggers features, made it seem so wrong. It wasn't her time yet. It wasn't her place. But she only nodded, as her mother stopped breathing, as her belly came to its ragged halt. _

_We went back to Alexandria in queen Brahne's escape pod. We also brought…Dagger's mother with us. She kept gazing at it the entire way back, as if asking, begging, for her help. Those dark eyes so scared, so confused. _

***

"It used to be so scared of death. Of just stopping…like her… like my brothers."

Vivi was lying in his bed, buried beneath sheets and blankets. He bore his hat as always, the only visible feature being his eyes. Their glow was dimmed to only a pale, flickering light.

"Vivi! Stop this! You may not die at all."

It was Freya, kneeling by his bed. She appeared calm, stoic. Yet her words betrayed her. Unraveled the sorrow and denial underneath. Garnet would see to it that she would not be wrong.

She couched; a weak, dry sound, a pathetic call for attention. But it worked. Every face in the room turned towards her; Zidane, Vivi, Freya, Eiko, Blank, even Amarant skulking in the corner. Vivi's sons where there too, but she'd never been introduced to ether of them.  
Flickering candle lights by the walls and nightstand gave the scene a suitably dramatic atmosphere. The shadows hovered on every face, carving out their features. A wall of shock and incredulity met her and none of them made any effort to conceal it.

Her old self-consciousness returned with full force, eyes wavering uncertainly before they settled on Zidane. He had been waiting, she knew. Waiting by the window for three days. She could spot the stool he'd been sitting on. It was no comfortable throne, but then again he'd only been using it for three days. Not ten whole years. Still, he had been waiting for her. Believing in her. Yet now that she was there he looked just as thunderstruck as the rest of them. Eyes a little glazed, glimmering in the candle light. His hair was mussed, with dark rings underneath his eyes. Eyes that stared and stared, as she walked across the room and sat by the foot of the bed.

"Vivi," she whispered, stretching out her arm and grabbing his tiny hand. "Don't welcome death quite yet. I might be able to help."

"Dagger!"

It wasn't Vivi, but Eiko's enthusiastic voice that responded.

"Oh, I can't believe you're here. We didn't think you would come. Oh, I'm so sorry for last time. I really am. Do you think you can help-"

"I believed you would," Vivi's weak whisper interrupted his energetic friend. She silenced down, eyes returning to him.

And still Zidane had not yet spoken.

"Thank you."

Squeezing his hand a little harder before letting go, she got out her Rod.

"I cannot be certain if this will help…"

"It's okay," he mumbled. "No pressure."

Feeling the corners of her mouth turning upwards despite the situation, she began preparing herself. Emptying her mind wasn't as easy as it had been. Especially given that a whole room was staring intently at her, all pinning the last of their hopes on her failing abilities.

She turned the Rod in her hands. They shook slightly from the pressure, no matter what Vivi said. Once she had been able to feel the sparks of magic respond in her mind from just laying hand on her weapon. It was all empty now. Dark. She reached out. Searched for that responsive tug that told her she had found it.  
Summoning forth the cura-spell took longer than it should have. And like the cure-spell and the summoning, it utterly exhausted her. The silvery sparks that danced about her and Vivi drained her, as if drinking dry the pool that was her strength.

As the sparks dimmed she noticed her eyes had squeezed shut in the effort, little beads of sweat gathering on her forehead. Her eyes fluttered open to be met by Vivi's. Her heart fell as she saw the paleness of his eyes, only made a little stronger by the spell. The alteration was minuscule, not nearly enough to make the least of difference. But only she new that.

"Oh, it's working! How're you feelin', Vivi?"

"Well done, Garnet."

Freya rewarded her by a light touch on the shoulder. They had all tensed up, suddenly sitting that much straighter, everyone seized by sudden hope. All except Zidane. He looked the same; grim, sad, his mouth a straight line. And still he did not speak.

"A little better," Vivi answered Eiko who hovered over his bed, giddy with overflowing joy.

"Thank you."

But Vivi also new that it was not enough. Not nearly.

"Maybe you should do it again. Or that other spell, y'know," Blank exclaimed, met with a chorus of approval. Every head was once again directed at her, all eager faces lit. Did they not see her exhaustion? Did they not notice the drag of her eyelids when she blinked, the slump of her shoulders, the dimness of her eyes that was so utterly outshone by those hopeful ones that met hers.

She met the eyes of her former lover, usually blue like a cloudless sky, now faint like hers. He knew. He knew her better than anyone, knew that if she had not yet healed the mage it was because she couldn't. Yet still he did not speak.

Pushed on by their hope and trust, she gathered the Rod for another attempt.

"I think you must use curaga. Perhaps even curaja. It's okay, I've got some ether if you need it," Eiko urged her on.

As she was concentrating on the spell, trying to rid any stray thought from her mind, she knew why. He was punishing her. Zidane was punishing her. For she may have been waiting by that window for ten years, but she had never given him a reason to stay once he'd come.

He had been waiting for her. Sitting by the window, watching the trail, listening for footsteps that resembled hers. She he would forgive her eventually, but right now she was being punished.

They all expected her to save Vivi. And all of them would, on some level, hold her to blame when she could not. After all, she'd once defeated the great Necron with her spells and summons. This should be easy. And he did not speak up, warning them that she was greatly weakened, that she would not be able to heal him.

He watched as she centered herself and held the Rod out. Watched as the golden sparks of the curaga-spell began to flow. Light burst and danced about them. Flowing and draining just as before. As the draining increased and the flowing slowed, the sparks dimmed. Or perhaps it was just her faltering vision.

The world grew black, darkness creeping up and swallowing it. She heard the staff hit the floor, as if it all happened far away.

And still he did not speak…

***

"…He's gone…"

A light brush through her hair and the familiar voice so close brought her back to consciousness.

"Vivi."

"I'm so sorry, Dag. There was nothing you could do."

His face was turned against the light that flowed through the open windows of the inn. His face was in darkness, a sharp contrast to the brightness of his hair. The sun caught every strand, reflecting it back with twice the force. It made him glow.

"No…There wasn't."

Her voice was hoarse with strain.

"It's okay. You did your best."

As her eyes fluttered shut, shielding her from the persistent light, she new she was forgiven. She was forgiven, and Vivi was gone.


	8. Chapter 7

**A/N: **Seventh chapter is up! I just though I'd mention that this is a T-rated story. I think maybe it should be bumped up to an M, but I'm not entirely sure. Let me know!

**Disclaimer:** Final Fantasy IX is the property of Squaresoft.

Chapter seven

"I bet it's that scoundrel!" Steiner murmured and banged his jug of beer back down on the table. The contents gushed over the sides, moistening his hands with its sweet, sticky liquid.

He didn't drink. Not usually. But on a boat surrounded by drunken sailors and a wife who endeavored to drink them all under the table, he thought it best to pretend. If only to salvage some dignity. He remembered a particular occasion when the aforementioned scoundrel had seen it fit to make declare his abstinence to an entire ships crew, making him the butt of jokes for the remainder of the trip. He felt no inkling to repeat the incident.

Nevertheless Steiner showed no restraint in regards to spilling, as he sat in the mess-hall taking dinner with his wife. Given that they were not only captain and general, but that Beatrice also was Alexandria's current regent, they could have eaten in their luxurious, grand cabin. But they both felt more comfortable in the mess-hall with their crew. Unless of course there were a drinking competition going on.

Beatrice looked up from her own jug, arching an eyebrow in question.

"And what scoundrel are you referring to this time?"

"That monkey-boy Zidane! Knew it from the first moment I saw that pretty face of his. Knew he would mean trouble."

She snickered before taking another hearty gulp from the jug.

"He saved her life many enough times, if that is what you are referring to. And he has been visiting the castle these ten years."

"What?"

This time the spilt beer emanated from his mouth that had fallen open in surprise.

"Wipe your chin, Steiner. And yes. He has."

"Well then that proves it. It must have been him."

She sighed, lifting her arm to gently wipe away the drops he had missed.

"On the contrary. He seemed quite contented visiting whenever he saw fit. It was her that was always unhappy."

She let her hand fall away, a frown clouding her features.

"I think she has been contemplating this for some time, Steiner. I knew her to be unhappy, I knew she was yearning to travel, see the world once more. But I can never imagine she would actually go through with it. She is far too responsible."

"You speak as though you wished her to leave."

"My only wish is for the happiness of both Garnet and the people of Alexandria."

"But you don't think that that is necessarily the same thing?"

A loud, ringing noise disrupted her answer. He counted the number of rings before the bell settled down.

"Five."

"Then we must be there."

***

The Black Mage Village was one of natures little miracles. On a continent of scorching sun and endless deserts, there were this little haven of lush, green trees and mossy riverbanks. The rich canopies cast a shadow-play on the ground, moving from one side to the other as the sun moved across the sky.

Garnet scrutinized the leaf-patterns that danced over her body were she lay on the forest floor, moving hither and thither in the light breeze. It was captivating, so much so that she momentarily forgot were she was. But never for a second did she stop appreciating it.

The ground was soft and yielding underneath her. The damp moss seeped into her clothing, mud spattering her white blouse. A rich, fresh cent emanated from the ground underneath her, enveloping her senses. Her eyes shifted from the shadows up to the towering pine trees high above her. So far up they swayed dangerously. Her treacherous eyes made it appear as though they would crumple and come crashing down on her at any moment. Above the swaying trees were the sky. The desert sky of forgotten continent, with a blue so deep and a sun so penetrating. It reached her, glaring down through the leaves and branches, warming her were she lay.

"Dag."

A soft voice called her from down the path. Eiko, who had been taking a stroll to the churchyard, walking absentmindedly, peeking at the growth of the forest and the birds in the trees, now stopped and hovered on the trail.

"There you are."

Garnet sat up, moving to the stone steps as Eiko strolled over. She was all elegance and beauty in her blue gown. How pretty she had grown, and how very unlike old self. But that was just in appearance. She bumped down next to her on the stone steps in the forthright manner she'd always behaved. No dresses or castles or duties could divert Eiko from being her self.

"Mind if I sit?"

"By all means."

They sat in silence for a while, both perched on the steps of the churchyard. If it could be called such a thing. There were no headstones marking the people who lay buried there, no numbers telling what mage lay were. Nothing like her mothers towering mausoleum.  
The steps led up to a little hill were they buried their dead. But that was the only mage-made thing. From there on nature had been allowed to take its course, and what was created from mist would once more transform into mist. She could think no better place for them.

"So, you came…"

"I did."

"When are leaving?"

Eiko looked uncomfortable asking, shuffling her feet making tiny mountains with her shoe tip then crushing them under the sole. Her eyes were fixed on the endeavor, not meeting Garnets.

"I'm not."

With that her head shot up. Confused eyes met hers.

"What? You're staying here?"

"Well, not here, precisely. I will be returning to Madain Sari."

"…I don't understand…"

Garnet picked up a little pebble, turning it between her fingers.

"I will not return to Alexandria."

"Dagger!"

She rose. It impressed Garnet how elegant she looked, while at the same time almost shaking with anger. But why was she so upset?

"I realize you feel…guilty… about Vivi. But you can't just leave."

She was about to answer, shake her head and laugh, tell her that that was not what was going on. But she felt guilty about Vivi. She did wish she had appreciated her powers when she had them. Still, that was not her reason for staying.

"No," she gave her head a little shake. "That's not the reason."

"Then what?"

Eiko sank down again, perching herself at a lower step, her face leveled with Garnet's knee. It was as she had used to sit before, when listening to Zidane's stories. And just like then, her face was intent attention.

"I had a conversation with doctor Tot."

"Oh, really?"

"He made me realize… that I have more pressing duties… and also that I didn't belong…"

Her voice trailed away into silence. Soon only the mesmerizing sounds of the forest enveloped them. Owls hooting, trees swishing as the wind gushed through their branches. Garnet was the first to break the spell.

"I can't explain it now. I wish I could, but there is someone who deserves to know first. All I can say is that I had to leave. You were right. I am only an orphan-girl from a lost city. I never belonged on that throne. I had to leave…"

"What?"

Zidane. He had been walking to meet them, his steps muffled by the softness of the ground. Therefore they had not been alerted to his presence. He had frozen on the path with an expression as thought he'd been struck by Ramuth himself. His eyes were wide, mouth slightly open. He looked almost comical.

"I think I'm gonna go…"

Eiko rushed past him in a flurry of blue linen and purple locks. Garnet followed her flight with her eyes, waiting for him to speak.

"You're…. you're staying?"

She had thought their reunion would be different. Of all the times she had imagined it, he'd always been happy. Nothing like this confused creature that stood before her. She rose, a little uncomfortable with the lack of lace and skirts her outfit presented, and walked slowly towards him. He looked at her all the while with a guarded expression.

"I thought you knew."

"How could I? You never told me."

He seemed almost angry now. She only shrugged.

"I thought you… well, no matter. Yes, you are correct. I am not going back to Alexandria."

He stepped closer. They were chest to chest now.

"You're not going back?"

Blue eyes, wide and bemused. They stared at her, intently, as if memorizing her features.

"Why?"

That was the question, wasn't it? Why indeed? She supposed she could jump into the whole story; the conversation with Tot, the failing abilities. All that had led to her realization that rule of Alexandria was not what she wanted.

But she didn't. He had a rather short attention span, and in any case that was not the way she wanted to do it. This was her only chance and it would have to be done right.

"Only because I wanted to come with you."

A tide rose; crashing waives of feelings crossed his face. It rippled and flowed, at last slowly settling on realization. He held out his hands. Thieves' hands; the dark skin tattered and scared. Lively hands. They bore testimony of were he'd been. Treasures he'd stolen, the people he'd saved. And now he offered her them without hesitance, just as she took them.

He guided her back down on the ground, lying next to her. Still clasping her hand, his thumb stroked calming circles on the back of it. They didn't speak, but simply lay there betwixt the grass and moss and fallen leaves. The world spun slightly, as if the treetops danced about them. Her mind was inattentive, floating without a body tying her down. Like the leaves falling about them. Then he lifted her hand to his lips, brushing them lightly, and suddenly she was grounded again. Centered on the feel of soft skin against softer lips. They travelled from her hand to her wrist but the journey was cut short by her blouse.

He propped himself up on one elbow, looking down at her. His features were relaxed now, the corners of his mouth quirked slightly upwards. He looked happy, contented. She realized she'd not seen him like that in years. Together with the disheveled hair filled with leaves and twigs, he looked years younger. She lifted a hand to pry out a leaf. Zidane caught it and began his ministrations there in stead.

The kisses travelled. Throat, neck, jaw, cheek, ear, nose, mouth. Light and teasing. Her breath caught, urging him on.

As a royal she'd been brought up to a certain standard. Thought her travels with Zidane years ago had somewhat lessened her criterias, she'd always held firm to the opinion that bedroom activities should be kept in the bedroom. A decade as queen had done little to lessen her standards. Therefore she was a little hesitant at first. But with the light breeze playing with his hair, the leaf's shade pattern on his arms, arms that gathered her close, she decided to let go.

Long, languid kisses in the grass. Tickling twigs and moist lips. He was so warm, kissing her the way a drowning man sought air. Slowly she dissolved under his attention, becoming particles that floated about. Gathering into his ruffled, dirty hair, his open mouth, his thigh arms.

When he broke the kiss to sit up, she was flushed and panting. A little sight of discontent escaped her as the particles that were her mind floated together. They made her aware of the roots digging into her back, the penetrating rays partially blinding her. But also Zidane, leaning over her. A wonderful flush tainted his cheeks as he began undoing the clasps of his west. In expert movements he had removed the garment and the singlet underneath. Scared and battered hands then moved to her clothing, that he whispered there were entirely too much of. She only nodded and helped him pull of the jumpsuit, leaving her only in the thin blouse.

Knowing full well how unladylike it was, she tugged it off, throwing it to the ground on top of the growing bundle of clothes. It made it all the more exiting, and apparently he thought so to. Deciding that enough was enough, he pushed her down again, resuming their kiss.

Had someone ever told her how a kiss could make one forget all ones problems, she would have snorted. But making love in the grass, the sun playing over her skin, the warm and fresh cent of the forest around them, was enough to make them both forget. She was no longer an abdicated queen, he no longer a heartbroken thief. They were sixteen again, in the middle of a life-altering journey, seeking each others comfort.  
It was love, she realized. It was all gentle, delicate cents, soft ground and pleasing sounds. Enveloped in the green and protective darkness. Love. He loved her still. He'd never stopped and never would.

Both naked now, they lay spread out on the ground. Without shyness or fear. If someone would decide to pay the churchyard a visit they would be most surprised. It did not even occur to them that this was holy ground, and might be thought of as disrespectful. Vivi, at least, would never have perceived it as such.

His fingers left a too hot trail as they travelled down her body, learning every curve and dip as if he did not already know them by heart. Loving and urgent. And hot, so hot. Her mind was anchored in his motions, keeping it from floating away. Such light-headedness, such strange fluttering in her stomach. It felt almost like swooning. But she didn't. She was done with that.

He made appreciative little noises in the back of his throat when she kissed him back. Letting her hands travel up his broad back, exploring every scar, every vertebrae of his spine, the little dip between his shoulder blades. His body was warm, so warm on hers.

She whispered his name, but he didn't want her to speak and silenced her down with a kiss. His hands travelled up her thighs, stroking inside her most sensitive skin, eliciting gasp after gasp. When he plunged inside her he was too far gone to be careful. She hitched her legs around his waist, driving him further in. As he began the rhythmic movements, the warmth that had been growing became all-consuming. Soon they were nothing but a bundle of heat. So inelegant, so uncomfortable on the uneven foundation, and so very contented.

When she came, he tumbled over the edge with her. At that moment he forgot all about silence, and gasped her name again and again. He slumped down, resting on her, almost crushing her into the ground. The roots digged more insistently into her spine, but she didn't mind. After a while he rolled off of her and they both lay panting in the grass. When their breathing stilled and the world came back to them, he sat up and began to dress. Swooping down he gave her a light, chaste peck on the forehead. Giving his belt on last tug, then he walked away.

***

"I've been thinking…"

Zidane turned from were he'd been standing, facing the window of the inn. It was dark, too dark to see his face. Still, she could detect from his voice that this was a serious conversation. She sighed, wishing they could have one night, just one, were they did not need to think or plan. But just as she reveled in her newfound irresponsibility, he had suddenly grown cautious.

"You said you came 'cause you wanted to come with me… I know that's not true, 'cause you had the chance to come with all these years. But I thought it didn't matter… I made myself believe it didn't matter why you came. You're here, after all. With me. But I think… I know now…Yes-"

He stepped closer in affect, driven by the emotions she could detect in his voice.

"I need to know why you really came."

She sat up, gathering the sheets closer around her to protect her from the chilly night breeze that came seeping through the window. She felt around on the nightstand, locating the matches and lit the candle. It did a poor job of illuminating the room, but at least he was more then just a shadow now. She motioned for him to sit with her, and so he did. Crossing the room, he sat down, fighting his own impatience for her answer.

"I have my reasons," she began hesitantly, not quite knowing how to best make him understand. "I had reasons for staying as well as leaving. But you must first understand…It must be difficult for you to conceive this idea, you who have been raised to no belief other than your own integrity, to understand my choices. You live after your own code of moral, and for you to grasp the concept of duty and what it holds for me…" she trailed of into silence. He didn't speak or urge her on, but let her collect herself and start afresh.

"In my family, growing up, the mere idea of turning away from responsibility, to not take the bad with the good, was something that simply didn't occur.

"When I first came here, I learned that my horn, as you might recall, had been cut. I was taught, no, I was forced to deny my ancestry and to uphold the pride of the Alexandrian throne. These ideas, thought I have questioned them, has become a part of me. Of my decision-making, of my actions. For you it is; chose what you want, do as you want. You listen to your heart and act thereafter. And I love you for it."

She held his gaze, wanting to smile, ease the mood. But when her mouth turned upwards, it was forced and without the warmth she endeavored to convey.

"But for me it's another matter entirely. You must understand this in order to understand why I could not choose you."

He stared at the floor, scrutinizing the floorboards, refusing to meet his gaze. But as he had been patient with her, she would be with him. So she gathered the sheets closer and waited.

"You're not choosing me… So you came here because of something else. Or rather, staying for something else." He looked up, calm but sad. "Can I ask what?"

"I have spoken with Tot, and decided to help rebuild the summoner tribe. I have taken my eidolons for granted all these years. It's time I began giving back."

"I see…"

She grabbed his hand, turning it over in her lap.

"Zidane, please understand. I love you dearly. And you were right, Alexandria was no place for me. But I don't have it in me to simply…be. I need a purpose."

"I realize that you have obligations… and I would never expect you to abandon them. Not for me…"

"But don't you see? I am free now. I mean, I will have a home in Madain Sari, I will have work that needs to be done."

She though of her fading powers and the city that was no more than a ruin. "Much work," she amended. "But I will be free to travel with you when you wish it… And I think it is for the best. You will keep your drifting existence, not tied down to duties. And I will once more have a worthwhile goal. Yet we will be together all the while."

"You're right. It is for the best. It's perfect…"

He stilled wished that she had left because of him, that she stayed because of him. She knew, for she wished it also.


	9. Chapter 8

**A/N**: Sorry it's taken so long to update. Real Life got in the way I suppose. Now it is here though, chapter eight!

Thanks to Jaslazul for the thorough and helpful beta-work.

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Final Fantasy IX

Chapter eight

Steiner, with what he thought was a _hidden_ passion for the dramatic, seized his sword from its scabbard, and jumped eagerly up and down as he waited for the teleportation pads on _The Red Rose_ to ready. There was no place to land in that thicket of trees that protected the Black Mage village, so teleportation was the easier way. A rather unpleasant business, but he would have to endure. He had, after all, put himself through far worse for his queen.

The jar began to glow, indicating that it was fully charged. Beatrix took a step forward and jumped in, soon to be teleported down in that little blotch of colored light. He jumped after her, feeling his being disintegrate and flutter together in a ball of light. His mind was still functional, though his senses where gone. It was a strange sensation, as if floating around in nothingness. After a few seconds it was over and he was once more himself, standing on the leaf-scattered trail that led to the hamlet.

It was a beautiful day, as always. Next to him, the sun made gold of his wife's hair. It glittered and glimmered in the sun as she swept it impatiently over her shoulder.

"Alright, let's go," she mumbled, not bothering to wait for their backup. It was, after all, no feat for her to singlehandedly take on a pack of mages. When that pack was a bunch of life-loving pacifists, just bringing the Save the Queen seemed excessive. But just as she never relinquished the sword, she never relinquished her caution.

He followed her up the trail in reticence. It was not that they were in a mood, but rather an increasing fear for their queen; though they were her subjects, they were also her friends. And Garnet did not have many in which she could turn to in confidence. Beatrix's words concerned him; Garnet was not happy. If so, and if she had indeed run off, he would have to face a major moral dilemma. He could appeal to Garnets sense of duty. He was certain he'd be able to make her return. However, if what Beatrix had said was true, that would be little more than coercion. The other alternative would be to leave her be, let her be happy. Then he himself would have to take up the role as regent, together with his wife.

He was as of yet indecisive. Firstly he would have to find the queen, which might prove rather difficult. The only thing he knew with palpable certainty was that Zidane would pay. One way or the other that thieving lowlife was responsible, and this time he would not get away so easily.

"What do you plan to do?" he asked his wife as they paused before entering the village. "When we see her, I mean. If she truly has abdicated, what do you intend to do about it?"

She looked at him, her stark eyes surprisingly warm.

"I do not know."

"Well…" He sighed. "We better go. If nothing else, I'm eager to see what condition master Vivi is in."

And so they enter the village.

It was just as romantic and idyllic as he remembered. It had not expanded much since last time. Nothing more than a few extra mills and houses. He also noted that they had expanded the river, creating a wed of channels that passed by every house. No doubt very useful when fetching water. Also, it probably contributed to the amazing growth. For the biggest change of all were the trees and flowers that popped up seemingly everywhere. Coating houses, bridges and porches. The flowers, always in bloom, scattered their petals on the world below. It all looked enchanted. He caught himself staring, appraising the beauty of the world around him. It was not until he saw Beatrix, seemingly unaffected by the surroundings, that he got a grip on himself.

"To the inn?"

Squinting around at the closed doors, she nodded. "Lead the way."

The clanking of his armor alerted the villagers, who each in turn peeked out of the window as they passed. Maneuvering through the houses and streams, Steiner peeked at flowers and birds in what he hoped was an inconspicuous manner. But upon reaching the inn, he reassembled his scattered attention and strode confidently through the door.

"Excuse me," he boomed across to the room, startling the mage behind the counter. "Could you please tell me if there's been a young girl passing by here? Perhaps visiting master Vivi?"

The mage, not used to receiving any visitors to his inn, was confused by the sudden onslaught of attention.

"Sh- she's in there," he said, pointing at a room.

Beatrix thanked him, while Steiner immediately strode across the floor and knocked sharply on the door.

"Enter," came a sing-song voice from within. And so he did.

Pushing the door open with a little more force than strictly necessary, he was suddenly haltered in the midst of his advances. For the person on the bed was not the one he'd thought it would be. It took a moment before he understood who the beautiful young woman with the long purple hair and impeccable pose was. It had been many years since, and these young people changed so rapidly, Steiner mused. But her horn gave her away.

"Eiko! I-… I'm terribly sorry for intruding. I'm looking for her majesty you see, and-"

"Oh yeah. I figured you would come. Sorry, she's not here."

Hmpf! Her manners had not much improved since last time.

"You are certain? We have received news on Vivi's condition, and thought she might be here."

Beatrix came up behind him, adding to the confusion.

"She's not here?"

"No," Eiko said, seemingly enjoying their bewilderment. Then her face grew grave. "And as for Vivi, you're just too late. He's gone… Two days past now."

Steiner felt as thought someone had punched him in the guts. He was endlessly thankful for Beatrix's hands encircling his arm, holding him up. Had she not, he was certain he would have fallen to the floor. Numbness spread relentlessly through his being, and it took several seconds before he recollected himself.

"Master Vivi… I…"

"I know, Steiner," Eiko whispered, saving him from saying, or stuttering rather, any more. "I'll show you where he's buried, if you want to, you know, say goodbye."

"Yes, thank you. That would be most helpful, but, ah, first if you could answer some queries regarding her majesty."

"Shoot."

"Ah, all- all right." He drew himself up, trying to shake the numbness and focus on the task at hand. "Do you have any idea of where the queen might be?"

"Yes." Eiko stood and walked to the window, but refrained from deliberating. Steiner and Beatrix stepped further into the room, closing the door.

"She was here, visiting Vivi. You just missed her."

"Where has she gone to?" he asked, slightly annoyed by her lack of cooperation.

"I'm-"

She cut off, turning from the window, the light framing her figure casting her face in shade. Quite the dramatic gesture, he had to giver her that. The young woman seemed to have developed a love for the theatre, just as Garnet.

"I'm not certain I should say…"

"Please Eiko," Beatrix pleaded, taking a milder tone than Steiner. "It's imperative that we know."

"I thought she'd abdicated. What can you want with her now?"

Steiner recognized her reluctance as genuine concern for her friend.

"Please, she's happy now. At least I think so. Can't you just leave her be?"

"It's not as easy as all that, Eiko," Beatrix sighed. "We cannot force her to come with us, but we need to see her. If nothing else, than to verify that she has indeed abdicated of her own free will, and that she confirms me as her successor."

"…Madain Sari," Eiko whispered, turning back to the window. "She's gone to Madain Sari."

"Thank you Eiko," Steiner nodded. "If you could show us to the churchyard now?"

"Yes…"

***

Garnet looked around at the ruins surrounding her. The city was nothing but an enormous pile of rubble. Yet the fountain in the middle of the town square still pumped water. The river ran fresh past, giving life to the vegetation growing there. And underneath the ruins of broken buildings, there were beautifully patterned cobblestones, there were stairs and columns and behind it all the Eidolon wall, like background scenery. What memories it all brought with it. And what possibilities.

She shuffled her feet, kicking up clouds of red sand. It settled on her orange breeches. The burning sun, so mush closer in this part of the world, shone as hot and strong as ever. The persistent warmth rendered her tired. Beads of sweat gathered on her forehead, sliding down her face, gathering at the tip of her nose. After a while she didn't even bother wiping it away, but let it drip down on her blouse. Her hair, with its lush thickness and magnificent raven colour, made her neck unbearably warm. She kept whipping it from this side to that, hoping to create a little breeze, but it did nothing to cool her overheated neck.  
Yet, despite all these nuisances, she stood tall, waiting. Hour after hour.

When she had left him in the Black Mage village he'd promised he would come, though their mutual understanding was not entirely what either of them desired. Still, it was the best solution. She was well aware that Zidane had wanted her to choose him. He was such an unabashed romantic. She wished it also, but it was no realistic solution. She knew herself fairly well, and was certain that a life of purposeless drifting was not something she could live with. This would be for the best. In the end he would see that too. If he should ever come.

He'd said he would gather some stuff. She didn't quite know what. There could be a number of things. Eiko had given her permission to use her old house for the time being, but still, there were plenty of things they needed. So, he'd set of to fetch some stuff while she waited. She knew she would not have to wait long. A trip with Choco took almost no time at all. Still, the anticipation almost made her sick.

The fact that she was scared to death that he should not come as he'd hastily promised at their parting almost a day before, served as proof that she did not trust that he would show. Not that she did not trust him; she knew no one better. It was more the fact that she was scared her proposal had been unjust, and that she had chased him away by being unreasonable once more.

So she stood there, waiting. Not daring to move or rest as if her actions were somehow linked up to the chances of him returning. She swayed a little in her exhaustion, but did not falter. Her throat burned with thirst; she'd finished up her canteen hours ago. Her cheeks were flushed, pit stains growing under her arms and down her back. He must look a fright; some sight he would be met with.

The sun travelled across the sky, the shadows moving on its accord. They grew longer, more twisted for every hour. She followed its path with her eyes, taking care not to look directly at it. Still, her eyes burned a little, black spots popping up in her vision. Nothing but the sun adorned the sky. Therefore she immediately noticed when a black shape became visible on the horizon. With a pounding heart she saw it come closer. But as it grew larger and larger, she soon realized it could not be Zidane and Choco. The shape was too large and moved too fast. An airship! Her heartbeat soon eased back to its normal rhythm. But when the ship didn't pass over as she expected, and began descending right outside the village, she got confused. It wasn't until she recognized what ship it was that she understood.

The Red Rose II landed right outside the village. The roar of the engines echoed through the ruins and reeves. She briefly considered hiding, not wishing to face any of the ministers sure to come and try to persuade her to return to Alexandria. But, she conceived, it would have to be done. If she were to put that part of her life behind her once and for all, she would have to do this.

After a few more moments of waiting, she heard the unmistakable sound of clanking armour moving up the passageway. She recognized that sound anywhere, after living with that noise for almost a year. Relentlessly and without pause. Around the bend came Steiner, his wife right behind. She stood tall in the midst of the square, waiting for others to follow. But none came.

"Your Majesty," Steiner panted as he reached her. He'd grown a little larger around the girth since last time she'd seen him. It had been many years after all. But his strict eyes and devotion to duty appeared unchanged.

"At last we have reached you. You-" his voice cut of as he for the first time took in her appearance. "You look fatigued."

"I have been standing here a long time Steiner. It is good to see you. Beatrix."

She gave a nod to her former captain and general.

"May I ask what you are doing here? Were my instructions not clear?"

Beatrix stepped forth, standing beside her husband. Together they made a wall, a towering demand, staring her down.

"Yes, perfectly. Still, I think you know why we're here."

She nodded, frowning. Why could they not let her go?

"I have chosen to leave Alexandria and the throne. My reasons are for me alone."

"You must forgive me, your Majesty, but we cannot accept that," Beatrix countered, her voice harsher.

"I'm not the majesty any more. No one is. Alexandria is to be a republic. That was my last decision as a monarch, and one only I can grant. You are to take rule until another is chosen. Does that not suit? If not, I can appoint another."

"And why not yourself?"

"I have other, more pressing obligations."

They looked angry now, both of them. She was so weary, so fatigued, that she was not sure she had the strength to face them both. Of only Zidane would come. Although, on second thought, he might only make matters worse.

"What obligations might that be?"

"To... my heritage. But also myself."

"Explain," Steiner commanded, drawing himself up in full height, every movement accompanied by the clanking of metal against metal.

"I'm not a royal. Not really. And we all know it. I'm a summoner, despite my mother's desperate attempts at dissuading me from it. Cutting my horn, extracting my eidolons. I'm a summoner, and the tribe needs me. I cannot stand idly by and watch my culture and heritage die. In addition," she inserted before the others could respond. "I was not happy there. Had I stayed a moment longer, I don't know what I would have done."

Her voice grew in strength, as she regained her spirits.

"I will not go back, and you cannot make me!" she yelled, taking a step back as if fearing they might tackle her and force her to come.

They did nothing of the sort, but stood there watching her intently.

"You are quite certain?" Beatrix finally whispered.

She nodded and threw out her arms, indicating the world around them.

"This is all I ever wanted. I wish to fulfil what I was born to do. I wish to be happy, living here with the man I love."

Steiner shuffled his feat. A look of utmost discomfort had replaced his anger.

"So you have left your duties for Zidane?"

"Not only. But that is certainly a big part of it. But don't I deserve a little happiness? After everything I've done for Alexandria. After everything I've done for Gaia!"

Beatrix sighed and stepped forward. She put a hand on Garnet's shoulder.

"Of course you do. But you realize we had to make sure you had thought this through."

She hung her head, feeling almost guilty now that her anger had dissipated.

"Yes. Naturally. My apologies."

"Where is that scoundrel anyway?" Steiner looked around with his most impressive scowl.

"I don't know."

"He's not here?"

"...not yet."

***

It was dark when he came. No sooner had Steiner and Beatrix departed, once more on good terms, than Zidane came through the gates of the village. Choco was not flying, but walking at a leisurely pace with numerous saddlebags strapped to his sides. The animal's golden feathers glinted in the darkness. He didn't give her his customary greeting, but rode up to her before dismounting. With the agility of a cat, he landed with perfect ease, his tail flickering back and forth.

She was about to greet him. To run up to him with abandon and hug him close. But his unusually dismissive and silent temper confused her. Instead she stood in silence waiting for him to make the first move.

He walked up to her. His face was made paler by the moons cold light, but his eyes shone strongly, even through the darkness.

"I heard what you said," he murmured in a low voice. The silence somehow suited the darkness. "To Rusty and Beatrix, you know. About you leaving and stuff..."

She didn't quite know what to say, so she kept silent, waiting for him to continue.

"You explained everything to me. About why you left. And I understand, I really do."

He grabbed her hands in his. They were as rough as always, and all his.

"I mean, I know... it's just hard. That you didn't leave 'cus of me. But I promise you, one day I'll come to terms with it."

He let go of her hands and cupped her face, bringing her in for a light kiss. She had been standing there for hours, all dirty and fatigued. Had it been any other man she would have been painfully self-conscious. But she knew that he wouldn't care. It was trivial, meaningless. All that was important was his realization and that they were together. That was all either of them cared about.

Choco began chirping impatiently, ruffling his feathers, effectively ending the kiss.

"I'd better unsaddle him. He hates all those reins and stuff."

He eased out of their embrace and began loosening the straps that confined the impatient bird.

"You take this to Eiko's?" he asked after dislodging a bag and handing it to her. She left him to his task, and walked off in the darkness. During the short stroll from the square to Eiko's house, her mind kept busy reflecting over Zidane's decision. Or rather, realization. He understood. Or he would. He was a reasonable man, she thought. He would understand, and soon. That knowledge, or promise rather, didn't bring the euphoric elation she'd expected. It was something much more subtle that spread like a warmth through her gut. It was contentment.

It had taken them ten years to get there. And if she'd learned one thing along the way, it was that there existed no such thing as a happy ending. Because life didn't end. It sustained, mercilessly throwing unexpected challenges and difficulties in the way. And so life would keep going, along a line of ups and downs. And, she concluded, she wouldn't have it any other way, because it was only by being down one could truly see the contrast and fully appreciate life.

With this heart lifting conclusion, she disposed of the bag at the dining table. With her white magic, she lit a little ball of light, letting it float about the room and illuminate where the moonbeams could not reach. The house had no doors, which meant that trails from all sorts of wildlife, and whatever the wind saw it fit to tug with it, was scattered over every surface. Though she had an inclination against dirt and mess, a consequence of having spent most of her life in a spotless palace, she had no desire to start cleaning. In fact, she didn't have any idea of how to. But that could wait 'till morning.

She was about to begin unpacking some of the stuff he'd brought with him when Zidane entered. Dropping the pack of candles she was pulling out, she took his hand.

"Come," she whispered through the darkness and began tugging him towards the kitchen.

"Where to?"

"You'll see."

He followed her down the squeaky stairwell and through the precarious passageway into the cave and the dock where she'd left the boat not many days past. The little sailboat she had stolen was still tied to the pole, dipping up and down with the waves. The moonlight rippled and gathered again and again as the water constantly tore the beams of light apart on its surface.

Softly crashing waves muffled the sounds of their steps as Zidane followed her without a word to the boat. She stepped aboard, perching herself at its rear, making enough room for the two. As he sat, she saw his face was not the confused one she'd imagined, but attentive, eager.

"Do you remember what you told me last time we sat at this very spot?"

A frown creased his brow. In the sharp contrast between light and shadow, his face looked like a carved mask, every line plainly visible.

"Er... yeah, I think so."

He smiled, encouraged by the memory.

"You mean that time that I told you about Ipsen and Colin?"

"Yes," she nodded. She conjured that memory, the most polished and looked at of them all. "You told me then, that I shouldn't feel so responsible... About Steiner, Beatrix, Vivi. Everyone. Do you recall?"

"Vaguely." He smiled carefully. "It was a long time ago Dag. I don't seem to have your memory."

"Well, you explained how everyone had come for their own sake. Not just for me. They were each following his own path."

"Yeah, I guess. But I was right though, wasn't I?"

She nodded in confirmation.

"So you see, though we all got together for different reasons, each for his own purpose, the result were still the same. We're all bound together. No matter the reason. So does it really matter that you're not the only reason why I left?"

This time it was her turn to smile at him, all overbearingly and sweet. He smiled back, thought slightly tentative. She grasped her point, but it made no difference to how he felt.

"But that does not lessen the impact you have had on my life. The impact you still have. I have felt so alone my entire life, except with you."

Her words stumbled over her lips in her rush to explain. She seized his hands, clutching them between her own.

"I'm not sitting in a chair, passively observing life, the world as it turns. I am standing. And while I'm not observing life as I used to, I am living it and recognizing it for what it is. And I know that you must be part of it.

"We have wasted so many years. There is great distance between us. There is pain also, I won't deny it. But there is love. I haven't quite treasured it as you have, but I know that it is enough. That it makes the foundation to build what we both have been looking for. The blue light you've been chasing, the figure on the horizon I've been scouting after; a home.

"Can't we close the distance? Can't we build one? Here. Together."


	10. Epilogue

**A/N: **I am so sorry it has (once again) taken forever to update. The last couple of months have been terribly hectic, exams and illness consuming most of my time. I found it very difficult to round this story up and rewrote the epilogue multiple times before I was reasonably happy with it. But at last the story is done.

Thank you so much to all those who have bothered to read it through, and to those who have taken time to comment. I hope you have enjoyed my very first final fantasy IX fic.

**Disclaimer: **Final Fantasy IX is property of Squaresoft.

Epilogue

Nudged between the ocean and mountains, in the torrid desert heat of Lost Continent, lay Madain Sari. The desert was always bright, even after the scorching sun had set behind the mountains. It was always sunny in this hidden corner of the world.  
Once a year, however, Ramuth would have mercy on them, gathering heavy dark clouds from the west. The downpour was torrential, and in their open houses, streets and squares, they would all get very wet. For weeks after, the crops would pop up from the ground, the grass for once lush and green. Then night would come upon them, and the rain would end as abruptly as it had begun. The clouds would dissipate, and they would be able to see the sky once again.

To all the summoners and their families that had gathered in this little patch of desert to rebuild a city, it was the best time of the year.

In the village of Madain Sari, they possessed no such thing as an umbrella or raincoats. Running through the streets, water soaking her dress, Dagger found that she didn't mind. In fact she relished when exposed to the elements; the coldness dripping down her back, her hair plastering to her face. For every step she took, the water would splash up behind her, washing away the dust and sand that had gathered since last time the streets were washed clean.

It was evening, it was raining, and Dagger was on her way home. Making her way through the built up ruins that now made out their modest village, the streets got more and more crowded as she went, everyone out and about in the rain. Nudging her way through the pack of people, he slowly but surely made her way home. She did not stop, ignoring the greetings from her fellow citizens, but pressed on. She must get back. She must find him.

A woman, dressed in simple robes that clung to her generous frame, had stopped in the middle of the street, head turned upward. As Dagger approached, her head turned towards her, dripping wet and smiling.

"I think he left already," the old lady cried out as she passed.

Making her way down the street, meandering through the people that gathered, she soon reached the center of town. The fire was lit in the middle of the rounded stone square. By the blaze, in the rain, people were dancing, eating, celebrating. They yelled at her, asked her to join them. But she would not stop. It was not much further to go. Over the bridge, down the street, and then she were home.

Dagger had never moved out of Eiko's house. She had not even rebuilt much, because she liked the openness and simplicity. The kitchen, with its view of the ocean, had been kept roofless. Bursting out into it, she could not see far through the downpour. The world was a shimmering haze of water that covered the world like a blanket. A blanket that made every shape contorted and foggy. But she knew the figure standing before her by heart. She didn't need the clarity of daylight or sunshine to recognize him. Breathing a sigh of relief, she stepped up to the figure in the kitchen. She had not been too late. He hadn't left.

"I suppose I've found it now."

Zidane turned towards her, smiling through the rain. She took her place next to him, nudging her hand into his larger and warmer one.

"Found what?" she asked.

He took his time in answering, surveying the ocean for a good while. Dagger, basking in the light from the moon that had began peeking out from behind a cloud, shuffled her feet in the little pond that had gathered upon the kitchen floor. Her dress was as glued to her body, water still dripping from her hair. But she took no notice, staring up at the sky and the twin moons. The ocean had a light blue glow, reflecting the moons, twisting their shapes.

"Remember the story I told you? Years ago, in the Black Mage Village…" he began, eyes never flickering, but staring intently and brightly at the ocean ahead. "I told you about this kid, who was searching for his home. But he couldn't find it, 'cus all he could remember was this blue light."

She looked at him, his profile cut out by the bleak illumination.

"I remember."

She did. She remembered it all.

"It was you, wasn't it? The kid?"

He nodded slowly. "Yeah. It was me, searching for home. Terra…"

"And now it's gone…"

And Zidane would be leaving now. This wasn't the way she'd wanted to say goodbye. He sometimes left on lengthy trips and would be gone for weeks. But he always came back. She had made her peace with that long ago. Just as she had thought Zidane had made his peace with the fact that Terra was gone. That he would never find his home and birthplace.

"Terra is gone," he nodded. "But that was not what the story was about. Perhaps I should refresh your memory."

And then he commenced to tell the story he'd only told on one other occasion.

"Once upon a time there was a man," he began, pulling her closer, letting his hand settle on her waist. "There was a man who didn't know where he came from. This man had longed to find his birthplace ever since he was a small child… His birthplace. A place he remembered only in his dreams…"

His voice trailed away into silence. And just like she had done all those years ago, she pushed him forward with questions.

"Why?"

"He wanted to know more about himself, maybe. About his parents, the house where he was born… One day, the man left the house of his adoptive father and went on a quest to find the answer. His only clue was the blue light he saw in his dreams."

"A blue light?" she whispered when he went silent once more.

"Yeah. He thought it might be a memory of his birthplace. An ocean, maybe?"

"But there were no oceans at Terra."

"Hey," Zidane laughed, nudging her carefully. "You skip ahead. Anyways, as you know he didn't find it. After all, how could he? His only clue was a colored light. So he went back to the home of his adoptive father. Do you remember what his father did when he came home?"

He looked down at her, smiling expectantly.

"… no, I… He gave him a hug," Dagger tried feebly.

"Just as naïve as last time. No, he didn't give him a hug. The father raised his fist and beat the son he had worked so hard to raise."

Of course, she remembered know. The old image of Baku beating Zidane popped up in her mind.

"Now, to this day, I don't know why. But do you know what was even more surprising? The father smiled, after beating up his son! Can you believe that?"

He let the question hang in the air for a while, silent while they listened to the waives below, and the celebrations growing louder from the square.

"But this is what the man thought when he saw his father smile: this is my home. This is the place that I call home. The man was still looking for his birthplace. But he already had a home."

Turning her around in his arms until they were face to face, and stroking some of the dripping hair away from her face, he smiled down at her.

"So you see, even then I was searching, travelling. Even though I had a home. A home with three brothers and a father, who all beat me up. But I always came back. And I was glad to."

She knew all this from before. She had known it for years. Why then did he tell her?

"Here," he continued, gesturing to the house around them, "I have a much better home than ever before. I have a loving wife. I have my kids and my friends… and my home. I always came home, even when I had very little reason to. And now I have plenty."

Then, she realized, it was not she who needed reassurance. It was him. Once she had thought she would be able to go with him wherever he went. And he had begged her too, again and again. But she couldn't. She had her duties in the city. Rebuilding Madain Sari, gathering summoners and preserving the knowledge of Eidolons. That was her fate. She held firm to that. And she was quite contented with it. But though she no longer possessed the need to be with him all the time, it did not mean she did not need him at all. Or could even live without the knowledge that she was the one he would always come back to.

"I'll miss you too," she murmured in assurance.

He stroked her lips lightly, adoringly, before turning towards the ocean again. The rain was slowing, the sky clearing, the ocean shining a bright blue.


End file.
